It doesn't suit me...

...lounging around the house all day. I feel bored and useless. I've only watched a little TV--mostly General Hospital, Judge Judy (I mean, who in the world decided that was a good show to follow GH???), and HGTV. I've also made chocolates, painted Christmas houses, and organized a few scrapbooking things. I've made way too many trips to Wallymart, Zaxby's (by now, I think it's considered an addiction, R!), and the post office. I've happily received more Christmas cards than ever before (I think we're up to 21 now). We've only had one ornament fatality. And, I think I've finally convinced R that he really doesn't need an XBox 360.

I'm still anxiously waiting to hear back from that one job (expected call: Tuesday), and I will be starting back in the lab on Wednesday. I'm still wondering what I should do, though. If I am offered the job, do I take it (the first)? Or wait for some of my other application responses? The pay at this place won't be very good (according to what I was told at the end of the interview), but the location is good (hello, mom) and the benefits would be good. I'm not really counting my chickens, or whatever, I'm just trying to consider the "what ifs."

But, I have so many other concerns weighing on my mind. I haven't been sleeping very well for the past couple of weeks (besides the past 2 nights--those have been pretty good). With the holidays come all the emotions of realizing that a few members of my family are missing. I catch a whiff of a burning wood and think about grampa and the old furnace that was in their old house. He'd spend the warmer afternoons chopping wood, stack it up in the foyer (with extra on the front porch), and wake up through the night to load the furnace. Although I haven't spent a Christmas with my family since 2003, it's hard just knowing that he's not here anymore. Second AWOL is my sister, Jeannie. She didn't pass away, but is gone none the less. Nobody in my family has seen (or heard from) her since that Tuesday (Dec. 5) when she met mom at the house to get her stuff. I'm still trying to figure out how/if I should contact her (via phone or letter). On the hard nights I lay awake for hours going over the things I "would" put in her letter. I honestly don't know if it would even matter, or make any difference to her, but I feel like I should (want to) get a few things off my chest (out of my head and heart).

We don't have any plans for New Year's (we usually just stay home anyways), but if you know of a great fun party, let me know! If I don't "talk" to y'all before then, I wish you all a hopeful and blessed introduction to the New Year!